Or How to Look Good, even if your Child and Delivery Drivers are the only People Who Might See You.
Beauty regime and busy mums… is it even possible?…
Not always.
In my case - for the first few months after giving birth - beauty regime and self-care felt like something from a sci-fi movie - impossible and unachievable.
There is nothing unusual or wrong with that. The first few weeks or months of parenthood are so overwhelming and surreal that it’s very easy to forget about your unique needs as a woman and a human being.
I remember looking at myself in the bathroom mirror a few months into motherhood - the excitement and adrenaline of becoming a parent have subsided. The sleepless nights have finally caught up with me - I looked dreadful in my baggy clothes of uncertain colour and unkempt hair.
One thought flashed through my mind, like a comet - I look like a panda, and not in a cute adorable way...
Then another thought flew by - I should not be too hard on myself - I have just pushed a whole tiny human out of my body.
But I so desperately wanted my child to have a happy, glowing mum.
So I took a piece of paper and wrote down everything that I wanted to change. There are many more small rituals I introduced later on, but those outlined below were the beginning of my journey to rediscover the woman within.
I hope that some of the simple ideas that worked for me might help you:
1. To moisturise or not. To moisturise!
We are not getting younger, are we? Our skin is like our wetsuit - it gets battered by various forces of nature - the sun, the wind, the spoon thrown by our child. It needs some extra care and protection. No time for spa salons and super nourishing facials?
Simple moisturising cream will do. There are even home made options if you do not trust what they say on those beauty products.
By the way, my grandma swore by a sour cream facial! Apparently, it helps to retain moisture, so no excuses.
Moisturising is like drinking water - you are hydrating your tired and sleep-deprived skin. It will thank you later on.
2. No nightwear during daytime.
PJs are fantastic! Everyone needs a pyjama day once in a while, but not every day. If you wear them everyday, they stop having those magical qualities of cosy lazy Saturdays.
I wanted my comfy clothes to be there for me, as a treat. When wearing my PJs on those special weekends, I want to be transported back to my childhood, where unicorns were real, and there was nothing to worry about.
But it's just me. If wearing pyjamas make you happy - go for it! Happy mama, happy baby!
3. Foundation or concealer forever.
Yeah, baby! As I mentioned before, I have dark circles under my eyes, had them for as long as I can remember.
I also have a super uneven post-acne skin. Moisturiser and a bit of foundation with SPF 15 are what I use every morning. It makes me look rested, so why not.
4. Eyebrows.
If - like me - you are a proud owner of superfine eyebrows of an undistinguishable colour - paint them! Use that pencil or any other eyebrow kits - you’ll be surprised how much more awake you’ll look with eyebrows on.
Regardless of how tired I am every morning, I give my child a toy, a book or my phone and try to resurrect those eyebrows. They don't always comply. Or one might, but not the other. But uneven eyebrows are better than no eyebrows, that's my new mantra.
5. Glasses as a secret ingredient.
I have to wear glasses. I cannot really see much without them. I own one pair of bright red Ted Baker cuties. Bought them because of the colour and because
I thought they made me look fun. Well, earlier this year, my sister dragged me to try different glasses on. She also tried to 'lose' my red ones.
All I am prepared to admit is that my bright red glasses make me look like crying is my favourite pastime activity. Red also clashes with my acne-prone skin so all in all - not an attractive combination.
Basically, if you wear glasses - go for those that compliment your features and make you look… interesting, sassy.
6. Trousers or pants.
I cannot stand tight trousers of any kind. They suffocate me. So while on maternity leave, I enjoyed wearing shapeless pregnancy leggings with baggy knees.
They served their purpose for the first few months, my postpartum belly is forever grateful. But then I saw my reflection in the mirror while opening the door to the delivery man. I did not like what I saw.
So the decision was made to only wear something more figure-hugging, that also made me feel good about myself.
Even if the only two people who'd see me were my other half and the delivery man.
7. Love the colour you are in.
Another unpleasant revelation - grey, red, and mustard yellow do not go with my skin. They were my go-to colours in pre-pregnancy and pregnancy.
But for some bizarre reason now they made me look like one tired zombie on the hunt for brains!
Thankfully my pre-pregnancy wardrobe was like a rainbow - all sort of colourful clothes lived there! But from now on, I'd only wear colours that make me look well and rested.
Conclusion
Ladies, this post is not about looking good for someone or about hiding behind make-up and a smile.
It’s about remembering that we are gorgeous women, always.
And if we need a bit of help from our beauty bag to make ourself feel better, to pick us up on a gloomy day - then we should do it.
Self-care is not only about mental health, eating healthily and exercising. It’s also about making small changes in our daily habits to help us be mums, wives and charming happy women.
Do you have any unusual beauty tips that you follow?