Did you know that according to the World Animal Foundation, Americans spend around $147 billion on their pets? Pets are loved and cherished. We forgive them their clumsy behaviour, we half-scold them when they are being naughty and continue treating them like royalty. We love them so much because they are so cute, adorable and fluffy.
But do we treat ourselves with an equal respect? Not really. The inner critic that we won't fire for some reason tells us off for anything less than perfect.
Why do we do that to ourselves? That's a good question and I don't have an answer.
But my recommendation for today's article is to love ourselves the way we love our pets by showing extra kindness, love and self-compassion.
Gentle understanding instead of rude scolding
How many times have you caught yourself being rude and super negative after a silly blunder?
What? You forgot to book the yearly service for the car? The inner critic won't let you off that easily, will it? It won't shut up about it until you hate yourselves, your life and everything around you.
So next time you hear that old song: “how could you! You stupid this and that.” Imagine you are talking to your pet and replacing your negative inner monologue with, “There there, you silly darling, I know it was not great, but things happen”.
Praise instead of punishment
There are times when you make mistakes.
Mistakes are unavoidable for humans. True fact.
And when we make mistakes, we end up being our harshest critic.
If you want to punish yourself as usual by depriving yourself of me-time or making yourself work extra hard - take a pause.
Think of yourself as your favourite pet who broke your favourite vase when hiding from visitors at your party. It's sad, and you might feel angry for a second or two. But then you'll see that it was not done out of malice but by accident, out of fear and anxiety.
You’ll then find your pet, hug it, and compliment it for bravery.
Do the same for yourself. Find what to praise yourself for.
Maybe you sent your work report late, but the quality was outstanding. Perhaps you've burnt that pie, but you stopped your child painting the living room walls in rainbow colours.
Think about it, and even if you are not super happy with yourself, you will still find something to give yourself praise for. It's better than punishment for sure.
Me time instead of overtime
We are so good at tiptoeing by our children's or spouse's rooms not to disturb them, wanting to ensure they have enough rest.
But when we are tired, we often don't know about it, but even if we do, we sort of ignore it.
We push it to the back of our minds and pretend everything is fine, everything is awesome. Who needs me time? Not me! I’m a superhuman! 🦹
Basically, we care more about your pet's well-being than our own.
How does it make you feel?
It makes me feel slightly angry, if I am honest with you.
Because my metaphorical pet does not need to wake up a couple of times in the middle of the night to attend to my kids. It does not need to go to work, clean the house or cook dinner. It does not need to plan the weekend activities so we don't destroy the house and be on top of each other for 24/7.
No, my pet does not do any of it. I do. And then I neglect my needs and defy self-care as a silly, luxury, or for weak people.
Would not I want to spend my days by the radiator purring and stretching? Yes, please!!!
So, here is an order:
Give yourself some well-deserved me-time. Better still, put it in your diary and let your family know about it. Your me-time is untouchable. Whether it’s every day at 8:30 pm for 30 minutes, half a day on Saturday or both. Do it!
Final thoughts on Loving Yourself Like You Love Your Pet
Basically, next time you feel like neglecting your needs and desires, putting everyone first and spoiling your mood by listening to your grumpy perfectionist inner critic - think about yourself as you'd think about your beloved pet.
Would you shout at it?
No.
Would you criticise it for being too slow or too fast?
I don't think so.
Would you make it work extra hard at entertaining you only because you feel like it?
I doubt it.
Now, apply all of this wisdom to your life.
You are your favourite pet. Love yourself like you love your pet, and I bet you'd be so much happier as a result.
Answer is baby boomers. This is according to marketwatch.com:
Baby boomers spend nearly 20% more on their pets annually than they do personal care products and services ($842 vs. $703), while millennials spend more on themselves, shelling out an average of $777 on personal care and $679 on pets each year.
We all should learn from millennials, I suppose.
*Updated with the latest data and stats in 2024.
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