Myriads of thoughts are swirling in our heads at a time. Most of them are neutral, like what to cook for dinner. Other rather negative and sometimes even toxic.
Negative thought might affect how we feel, our self-esteem and confidence. Hence it’s a good idea to learn to reduce the level of negativity we allow in our thoughts. It’s like adding a spam filter.
The trick is replace negative thoughts with positive or neutral.
It might sound easy, and it is, but it does take practice.
How to do it?
You might need to spend some time up front uncovering all those usual negative thoughts, like: I can’t do it, I am not good enough, it will never work, etc.
Create a list on your phone and open it when negative thoughts are too loud.
Instead of allowing negative thoughts to run around freely, catch them and replace them with a neutral or a positive one.
I am not good enough - I show up and I give my best
I can’t do it - I can try my best and there is nothing wrong with failing
It will never work - I’ll try and see what happens
Now you need to turn this practice into a habit as it will help you to boost your self-esteem in no time.
Practice using positive statements to boost self-esteem
Reread positive versions of your negative thoughts every day or even several times a day.
The idea is that you train your brain so that instead of going for your usual negative statement, you choose a positive one without a prompt.
It might take some time but after a while you will start using neutral or positive statements out of habit.
Remember when as a young person or a teenager your parents tried to teach you not to swear and use something benign instead of the most popular swear word? It’s a similar tactic. You practise and it becomes your second nature.
You will notice that your self-esteem will improve as soon as you reduce the volume of negative self-talk you use.
Final Thoughts
Don't give up if this practice does not work after a few attempts. You spent years allowing your negative thoughts to run free in your head. Be persistent and teach your brain to be more polite and gentle with you by using positive thoughts instead of negative statements.